Saturday 2 September 9:30pm

Mum has been co-opted onto the PCC, which now consists of her, Mrs Ramsbotham, the Treasurer, and our new priestess, Gwen, all other members having carried out their threat and resigned, together with the church wardens. Item 3 on the Agenda was the solicitor’s letter from the Civic Society, but nobody had brought a copy so it was not discussed.

Mum was in a bad mood when she got home, and perhaps I shouldn’t have asked her what they talked about instead, like for example knitting patterns and cake decoration, for she snapped at me: “No. We discussed the appalling state of the choir vestry. There are piles of music there with three inches of dust on them. Some of that stuff goes back to the year dot. You are Organist and Choirmaster. It is your job to get it sorted and tidied, for the Flower Ladies are complaining that they have nowhere to stack their Oasis.”

I did not know that my vestry was being used for storage of recordings of the sort of profane popular music favoured by Flower Ladies, and clearly it must be put a stop to. But I have conceived a brilliant plan, worthy of 007, even of M. Antony suffers from asthma and hay fever, and he probably expects to sing solos tomorrow. I will assert my authority and put him to work tidying the vestry! Even though Mum thinks the sun shines out of his ears she can hardly make a fuss – I will simply say that Antony’s long experience of choral music in the Cathedral Choir (before he was sacked) fits him perfectly for such an important task. It shouldn’t be hard to convince mum - I have almost convinced myself, to the extent that I am actually feeling quite noble.